2019 = A Mass Glow Up
We all thought 2017 was globally a complete shit show, but nothing could have prepared us for 2018. Every day a new, more ridiculous, news story broke. At one point, whilst scrolling through twitter, I genuinely mused “this is it, this is the apocalypse, we’re all just too dumb to realise it”. With that being said, we all need to make sure 2019 is less toxic. On a macro level, we need to continue to protest, treat the world better and spread kindness. On a micro, internal level, here’s what we all need to leave in 2018…
1. FORCING RELATIONSHIPS
Relationships (platonic, romantic and familial) should enrich your life. If they’re not, then they need to be renegotiated. This doesn’t negate rough patches and people calling you out on your bullshit, we mean toxic relationships in the real sense (not the Instagram co-opting of it). Support and love shouldn’t need qualifying or conditions. In 2019, cut out anyone who makes you feel like you’re not enough. You are.
2. SPEAKING BADLY TO YOURSELF
The way you speak to yourself matters. In 2019 we’re going to stop being our own worst critics because if you walk into a room of 100 people and 99 don’t believe in you, it doesn’t matter, what matters is that you believe in you. Womxn have learnt to hate themselves, don’t give the patriarchy what they want.
You might not think this is a serious one, but it is. Riverdale has taken a turn from shit-but-kinda-good watching to actual insanity. For real, what on earth is the gargoyle king and who wrote this garbage. Stop wasting hours of your life watching it. And if you don’t watch it, heed this as a warning to never ever start.
4. THE NOTION THAT YOU HAVE TO BE CHILL OR COOL
Let it go. We’re told constantly to be chill, to be low maintenance, to be cool. All this does is make womxn smaller. I’ve come to realise when men say they want women to be low-maintenance they really mean they want women to have low expectations so that they won’t be held accountable for their actions. Don’t dim yourself down for nobody.
5. THE INTERNET RUSHING YOU
Social media is brilliant. Yes, we all spend too much time staring at screens and it can have a negative impact on mental health, but it also builds communities and helps people feel less alone. It educate, it expands minds, it makes the world feel a little more accessible. But, it also shows an edited highlight reel; no one is posting their failures. In 2019 don’t let the internet rush you. Go at your own pace.
6. FEMINISM THAT ISN’T INTERSECTIONAL
If your feminism isn’t intersectional, it isn’t feminism. Cis white people – including me – need to work harder on understanding their privilege. And then dismantling it. In 2019 let’s all unpack our privilege with more vigour than ever before, become better allies and be louder amplifiers.
7. INTERNALISED MISOGYNY
Our internal misogynist likes to rear their ugly heads every so often. Next time you catch yourself judging a woman for their life choices or finding comfort in their flaws, stop and reflect. Why are you thinking this? Do you actually believe this? Is this conditioning? Do you actually just fancy her?
8. “NICE GUYS”
Nice guys don’t need to shout at you that they’re one of the nice guys. Anyone who self identifies as a “nice guy” just wants validation and is most definitely not a nice guy. While we’re here, leave women who identify as “one of the boys” in 2018 too. Their internalised misogyny is too far gone for you to help.
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